Misery Games

I love this NYT article on a dating service photography staff in Austin, TX. I realize it's not the main focus, but I wish I could find companionship in the form of strange co-worker friends. The last time I went out to lunch or dinner with a friend, she awkwardly left me after the food arrived. Granted she didn't realize the dish had pork in it, I didn't know whether to laugh or feel sorry for myself. Ditched in the middle of a Thai restaurant, feebly making an excuse about having to attend to something and asking the waiter to pack up my food.

I've heard that it becomes more difficult to make friends as you get older. So far, it's proving to be true. I really miss my college cohort. It's just not the same environment here. I'm not interested in going to bars, especially if the idea is to get loaded. I can't think of a more lonely act than becoming so stupid-drunk that you don't realize where you are or who you're with. Hardly social.

I spoke with Son a couple of weeks ago to officially catch-up, and I was so relieved to hear that he also was have difficulties making friends in pharm school. He even countered his mild-mannered personality and tried to rush for a frat. After a few weeks, his introverted self was exhausted from conjuring up all this social energy, and he reverted to studying at home.

I followed the same pattern, tried to go out to happy hour with classmates after a big exam or go to turbo kick class, but I would return home so worked up that all I wanted to do was retreat AKA eat cold fried chicken in my bed and watch a marathon of Breaking Bad. The only thing we've both learned is that we can't change our personalities, and finding one friend to complement it is hard enough. I've always looked up to sitcoms like Friends or How I Met Your Mother, and just sorely wish that I could have a group like that. Maybe that's part of my fascination with NY. Everyone is so independent that occasionally making a friend is necessary. I've talked to so many strangers there than here.

What do know is that my life is going to change dramatically again after a few more years. I could be in another city and maybe things will be different. Small Texas town, I hope not.